Infrequent Nights

I was wandering about on Saturday afternoon on my way to the 2-28 Peace Park. While passing Chiang Kai Shek’s memorial hall I noticed some sort of hullabaloo in the square so I decided to wander in and see what the ruckus was about. It turns out that over the past few weeks Taipei has played host to a performance art festival, focusing on circus and related arts. On the afternoon I was there, a free performance was scheduled. It was billed as a clown show featuring Canada versus Taiwan. In actuality it was a weak troupe of Canadian performers glued onto a traditional Chinese circus troupe. The segues between acts were weak to non-existent and the actual acts varied in skill from slightly-below-average to slightly-above- average. It was apparent to me that these two troupes were thrown together at the beginning of the festival and told to make a show together.

The juggler (using worn out 95 mm Renegade clubs) did a 1-5 club act. The only moment of note was the bit when he was juggling three clubs and two of his compatriots were waving the other two around behind him. It looked alright. The rest of the act was bad, involving too many drops, poor trick linkage, and a faffed finale. Incidentally the finale was a 5 club cascade sustained for about 8 catches until the pattern fell apart and the guy dropped a couple of clubs. I know Canada has better jugglers than this guy (hell I’m a better juggler than that guy) and I feel sad we’re being represented here by acts like that. That said, the Canucks did have decent costumes and their characterization was continuous and semi-entertaining. I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume their solo all-Canadian show was better.

The Chinese acts were slightly better in regards to both their choreography and actual skills. That said, I’d guess they were circus school students as the acts didn’t come off like the high level blow my mind technical skills acts I’m used to seeing from Chinese circus companies. They had nice costumes, good choreography, and the individual performers’ skill sets were well-rounded. Their best bit was the foot-juggling act which ended with a finale involving two kids from the audience suspended from a pole, and juggled by the antipodist.

At the beginning of the show the Chinese troupe performed a sort of Chinese Opera version of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. If this had continued throughout the show as a theme of sorts it would have improved the entire show. As it was it just seemed like a strange non-sequitur as the 15 minute Opera was not incorporated into the circus show at all.

I’ve included a photo of a few promo clowns who were wandering around with flyers for the public. Hint: you can tell they’re not real clowns by checking out their shoes.

Posted by Ryan at 08:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I apologize for all of the domain name changes, and whatnot recently. www.ryanwhalen.com is temporarily not working. Apparently my registration was flagged as there was a huge discrepancy between my IP address (from Taiwan) and my mailing address (in Canada). The registrar flagged me as a potential fraudster and suspended my account. I've just chatted with their tech support, re-registered, and will hopefully have it back up and running in a few days. In the meantime: www.sillyman.ca/ryan/ will continue working now and for the foreseeable future.

UPDATE: http://www.ryanwhalen.com should now be fully functional.

Posted by Ryan at 03:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Taiwan isn’t a strictly homogenous society. There are, especially here in Taipei, people of various ethnicities, cultures and colors. That said, there aren’t so many that we don’t stand out like lint on a black sweater. When I take the MRT I am virtually always the only white guy in the car. When I go to a park to juggle I am usually the only obviously foreign guy there. This leads people to a number of assumptions. The first of which is that I am an English teacher. The vast majority of white people here, especially those in my age bracket, teach English. The second assumption is that I am completely ignorant of the language. The third assumption is that I want a Taiwanese girlfriend. I don’t mind the first assumption. It has led to some interesting conversations, including me giving an impromptu English lesson on an MRT train to a very cute 4 year old who spoke surprisingly good English. The second assumption just leads people to praise my labored, and mistake-ridden Chinese utterances. The third assumption is a bit of a hassle at times. I think I finally know what it is like to be a babe in a bar in North America. Many girls here are desperate for a foreign boyfriend. Foreign oftentimes seems to be the only important criteria. A boy could be a complete minger, but provided he’s white and speaks English he’s a catch. This has led to me signing autographs, posing in dozens of photographs, and having to set a number of “language-exchange” partners straight. The infamous “language-exchange” is often used by locals and foreigners alike to find individuals with which to exchange things other than language.

As a foreigner one is often stopped in the street by school-aged children. All kids here study English in school. These kids are given “homework” in the form of instructions to go out, find a foreigner, and have a conversation. I find it humorous as these instructions are exactly the opposite of what North American kids are told time and again, “don’t talk with strangers.” Here kids are not only encouraged to talk to strangers, they have to have the stranger sign a piece of paper to prove that they have done so. Usually the kids just want your signature. The exchange goes thus:
Student: “Hi, can you help me with my homework?”
Me: “What do you need?”
Student: “I have to have an English conversation.”
Me: “What do you want to talk about?”
Student: (thrusting paper in my face) “Just sign this.”
I sign the paper, and they walk away. I’ve no idea why they bother finding a foreigner to sign the paper. Anyone could do as good a job as me of scrawling an illegible signature onto their homework. That said, I'd prefer to have them use me to skimp on their homework, rather than steal my MP3 player like many North American teens would do.

Posted by Ryan at 02:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

This blog can now be reached at www.ryanwhalen.com. I couldn't resist the $4.95/year domain name. It can still be reached via www.sillyman.ca/ryan/ but www.ryanwhalen.com is so much cooler. The photo blog is now at www.ryanwhalen.com/photos/.

Posted by Ryan at 06:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I can't really think of a decent way to tie this into my experience in Taiwan. Its just something I want to get off my chest. An idea, if you will, that I'd like to present to the world. If any psych majors read this, feel free to run with the hypothesis. I want nothing but an honourable mention when you accept the Nobel.

Men's bathrooms should have music piped in at all times, and that music should be loud and preferrably funky. Men the world over have occasional bouts of stage fright when using public restrooms, especially the urinals. I reckon it is an evolutionary artifact whose original purpose was to help prevent us from being caught with our proverbial pants down. I submit that toilet music would act to decrease the frequency and severity of these bouts of stage fright. It would work in several ways: 1) the music would act to muffle the man's own tinkle which would help to reduce his self-consciousness and 2) if the music were funky enough the man would be more inclined to relax thereby allowing himself to go with the flow. I think the effect various genres and volumes of music has on a man's ability to let himself go should be studied in more depth (that is to say in some depth at all).

I rarely experience this problem. I think it is a result of living on the road on and off for a few years and using hundreds, nay, thousands of public restrooms. Eventually one just has to get over it. However, I am frequently standing beside men who are very obviously suffering from stage fright. I feel sorry if they have to give up without delivering the goods. The application of my toilet music plan could help increase productivity, and worker satisfaction the world over. It would result in fewer overall bathroom breaks, increased ability to concentrate during working times, and a general sense of coolness in the can. So please help spread the word and advocate for music in a public restroom near you.

(image courtesy of: http://www.flickr.com/photos/drewish/)

Posted by Ryan at 12:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Lee Teng Hui was quite emphatic yesterday in his claim of Taiwan's defacto sovereignty. He also suggested that along with the defensive weapons now on the table (being blocked by the Pan-Blues) Taiwan needs to acquire offensive weapons. While I agree in principal, it is a dangerous route to pursue. If the PRC decides to take Taiwan by force the defensive options open to Taiwan will be of little importance. The People's Liberation Army can afford to simply throw men and machines at the island until it relents. However Taiwan is going to need more than a few conventional long range ballistic missiles to deter China. To act as effective deterrent they'd likely need unconventional weapons, of which the most effective deterrent would be nukes. That said, the presence of nukes on Taiwan would raise the possibility of nuclear escalation too high. In fact offensive weapons may be counter-productive to Taiwan. If China is really dead set on reclaiming the province their presence could be used by the PRC to justify a more devastating attack than would otherwise be necessary.

While Lee Teng Hui was chatting up Americans, the CCP was busy publishing yet another white paper. This time they have addressed the possibility of democratic reform in China. Their verdict: no way, no how. It is thoroughly unsurprising and depressing for those on Hong Kong who were hoping the two system approach had a hope in hell of working. The documents keeps alive such laughable concepts as "democracy under the leadership of the Communist Party of China" and the "people's democratic dictatorship" (emphasis added). This document should be carefully reviewed by those in Taiwan who sit on the fence divinding the Blues from the Greens.

Posted by Ryan at 11:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The front page of the today’s Taipei Times brought to light the Australian hubbub about a Taiwanese made toy. The toy is a plush chicken which, when choked, squawks, clucks, and flails like mad. Apparently the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA) feels it sets a bad example for Australian youth, and a bad precedent for toy makers. I think the RSPCA’s sarcastic examples of dreadful toys to come “Burn a Cat” or “Shoot a Dog” sound pretty entertaining. Besides, the example the toys set isn’t necessarily a bad one. In the event of a large scale disaster the ability to choke-a-chicken may come in very handy. Furthermore, with the current avian flu threat choking all of one’s chickens could be a prescient safeguard.

Given the current international trade situation Taiwan’s toymakers may want to market an “Evil Mainlander” toy. It would train kids to distrust mainlanders, and maybe choose their toy purchases a bit more carefully. The Mainland’s ability to produce various manufactures at incredibly low prices is sending low-skill jobs from Taiwan to China. Admittedly many of the companies doing the manufacturing in China are Taiwanese based, but if Taiwan doesn’t carefully manage their economic modernization they may end up with an unemployment rate similar to that of France or Germany where for years jobs have been outsourced overseas, and to Eastern Europe. This may lead to eventual choke-a-finance-minister syndrome in Taiwan, which would just add to the legislative violence.

Posted by Ryan at 10:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I've had a few requests for more photos, so I've created a new blog strictly for images. I didn't want to flood this one with pictures. You can see some photos at: http://www.sillyman.ca/ryan/photos/. I will put some more up in a week or two. You should be able to click on the images to see a larger version. If for some reason you want an EVEN larger version send me and email and I can get you one.

If you have any problems viewing the blog or photos, please tell me and I'll try to sort it out. I've gone about making it in a rather round-about way so as to reduce bandwidth consumption. There may be unforeseen issues.

Posted by Ryan at 11:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The page looks a bit different as I updated the software that powers it today. It took quite a while, and a lot of me doing computery stuff that I really don't understand. I've no idea what a MySQL database is, but I needed to create one. I've been modifying cfg files, running cgi files, and ftping things for hours. I'm sure if I were more competent with computers it wouldn't have been such an involved task. Nonetheless I'm done now. As an added bonus the archive and search functions actually work. Not that anybody really cares but me...

Posted by Ryan at 09:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

As I left campus today I was handed a book by a stranger. She smiled and nodded as she gave me the book and said in heavily accented English “Jesus loves you.” Which is fair enough I suppose. I guess he might. What do I know? I took the book, as I’m always looking for new ways to practice my Chinese and I figured the Bible would be as good a way as any. This particular volume is made extra useful as it has both English and Chinese texts so I can instantly check my translating.

Christianity has a reasonably long history in the East, but it really took off with the huge surge in global missionary work in the 19th century. Missionaries spent much of their lives living and preaching throughout East, and Southeast Asia. Much of the early Western scholarly work on the region is a direct result of this missionizing. Some of these missionaries claim to have converted tens of thousands of individuals. While their claims are dubious at best, there is no doubt that Christianity has had a lasting impact here. China is under increased pressure to recognize the Vatican (it still doesn’t as the Vatican recognizes Taiwan which is a no-no according to China). Korea has spawned Christian sects with global reach. Other Asian countries have large, vocal, and evangelical Christian populations.

When the woman handed me the Bible I started thinking about the history of missionaries and both the harm and good they have caused around the world. Their effects were global in scale, but highly differentiated by locality. It seems that in areas without strong recorded mythologies (I include all religions under this term) the missionaries exerted a force for rapid change. The Bible subsumed traditional religion. In areas with recorded religious texts the challenge was much greater, and thus the lasting effect not as great. Resultantly the world’s unwritten religions have either largely disappeared, or been written as obituaries. What we’re left with are a few religions, each with their own canonical texts. These texts must thus act as the ultimate arbiters of moral or faith based questions for those who ascribe to these religions. The problem with this is that these texts do not evolve. They are static, having been written from a certain historical frame of reference their applicability and pertinence decrease with time. Updated translations can help to keep them relevant, but they are not nearly as fluid as a pre-literate religion would have been. A pre-literate religion was largely arbitrated by local wise men or women. It was up to them to interpret beliefs for their parishioners. This allowed for more tailor made spiritual solutions to the problems of the day.

I’m forced to wonder whether this decreasing relevance of religious texts is somehow related to falling attendance rates at Churches, and a rise of secularism. Furthermore I wonder how long we will have to live in a world where those who are religious claim that their mythology is the mythology, that their book is the word of God (or the Gods) and holds the ultimate truth. I feel sophomoric harping on about such an overly discussed and argued about issue, but come on. I mean how long are people going to claim that God really wants women to walk around shrouded from head to toe? When will people stop claiming that God chose their tribe of desert dwelling shepherds as the bestest people in the world, and that everyone who doesn’t follow the minutiae of the contemporaneous notes taken during their conversations with the big man upstairs is going to burn in everlasting torturous Hell?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for religion. I think tradition and ritual are incredibly important. However religion, ritual, and tradition must be allowed to evolve as we do, or there will be a fundamental disconnect between who we are and who we believe we are.

Posted by Ryan at 12:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I assume there has to be legislation in Taiwan forbidding physical assault. For some reason this legislation is not abided by in the legislature itself. Politics are so charged here, with two opposing sides unwilling to make concession to one another, that debates often descend into brawls on the legislature floor. Yesterday's papers had photos of a member of parliament with blood streaming down his face after he’d been bludgeoned with another member’s cell phone. I don’t know why the behavior is tolerated. I suppose maybe convention allows for very physical debates in the legislature. However Taiwan should consider revising its stance on public fights in the parliament. I don’t argue this from some sort of moral-high-ground proper behavior standpoint. Rather I feel the spectacle does little to help Taiwan’s international relations.

The one international trump card Taiwan holds is that of the “democratic nation.” When its sovereignty is brought into question Taiwan can turn to the international community and argue: “But we are a thriving democracy. Look compare us to China we have civil rights, elections, and a thriving economy.” However with the situation as it is China can turn to its citizens and say: “Do you see what democracy will get you? Bloody brawls on the legislature floor.” Meanwhile the international community shakes its head as Taiwanese politics descend to violence and the USA becomes frustrated as a bill to sell advanced weapons to Taiwan is repeatedly kept off the legislature floor by the opposition. I can’t help but imagine that a little bit of decorum would go a long way towards improving the sense of legitimacy of the Taiwanese government.

Posted by Ryan at 12:57 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

After about a week of feeling miserable and eating virtually nothing but rice gruel I’m back in top form. I reckon I ate some street food which disagreed with my inexperienced North American belly. Hopefully I’ll build up a tolerance to whatever it is that made me sick. By the time I get back to Canada I should be able to gnaw on diseased pig carcasses with no ill effects.

This weekend is a long weekend in Taiwan, as in Canada. Monday is National Day here. The Taiwanese commemorate the fall of the Qing dynasty and “triumph” of republicanism in China. The PRC acknowledges this date as important, but uses the occasion of the triumph of communism in ’49 to celebrate their national day.

I have no concrete plans. I wanted to go and watch some missiles and tanks get paraded around, but apparently they’re all tied up defending the island from the threat of commie invasion. I could go watch a bunch of army boys march around which may be entertaining. I’m not overly familiar with martial displays. I’ve seen a few official guard changes here and there, and period demonstrations of historical military drills, but I’ve never seen a contemporary display of military might. I would be interested to know more about the development of displays of military might. Many countries have a deep desire to let it be known to both their citizens and those abroad that they have large, well trained, and well equipped military machines. It is traditional when heads of state visit one another to inspect the troops. It is just like when you go to that next door neighbor’s house for the first time, and she insists you look at her Royal Doulton figurine collection. Except the collection is of men who are trained to kill other men, and the next door neighbor is a head of state. So I guess it really isn’t that much alike after all. Unless the troop on display are limited edition special forces troops, with cute little rifles disguised as parasols.

Posted by Ryan at 07:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I’d like to think it was the pickled intestines I ate on Friday that made me sick. That would at least give me a rational reason for not wanting to eat it again. Alas, I know in my heart of hearts, I was feeling a bit sick even before I ate the intestines. This doesn’t alleviate my symptoms at all, but it does make my desire to never eat pickled intestine again an irrational one. Before I knew it was intestine I thought it was at least palatable. Regarding Taiwanese cuisine, ignorance really is bliss. I’m willing to eat most things provided I don’t know what they are. Once someone tells me which part of what animal a particular cut of meat originates from I am less likely to want to scarf it down. While I’ve heard the chicken heart shish kebabs are pretty tasty, I just can’t do it. Call me a chicken, tell me I’m a closed-minded North American, or laugh at my ignorance, I just have trouble eating offal. I’ll eat just about anything else. I don’t mind weird bugs, or slugs, or unidentifiable seafoods. I just have trouble with guts.

Liver was never served in my childhood home. Chicken hearts weren’t on the menu. Head cheese was unheard of. Occasionally liverwurst would make an appearance, but I would avoid it more staunchly than I, at that time, avoided peas (now one of my favorite vegetables). I don’t know why I make the distinction between an animal’s muscles and its organs, but I do; and it is a very clear distinction. I just don’t eat guts. I understand it is a completely psychologically rooted distaste. I’m sure lamb brains can be prepared in an array of succulent dishes, but my deep-seated distaste for offal will preclude me from enjoying any of them.

I think I can at times be an overly rational person. Perhaps I should embrace this particular irrational aspect of my personality. An excess of rationality is probably almost as harmful as the opposite. Provided I’m aware of where my irrationality lies I reckon a certain amount is a healthy part of being human. My distaste for offal is similar to many irrational fears and superstitions. They are all part of the incredibly complex array of traits that make us human. Our irrational habits and beliefs help to differentiate us from biological machines. They are all part of the wonderful mystery of what it is that makes us what we are. This at least, is how I rationalize my irrational distaste for animal guts.

Posted by Ryan at 12:36 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The smells of Taipei are exotic, plentiful, and varied. As one walks down the street he is bombarded with scent after scent. There seems to be more distinction between smells here than most places I’ve been to. Each small restaurant, shop, and home exudes its own particular aroma. Sometimes I try to imagine Taipei from the perspective of a dog, or other creature with a hyper-sensitive sense of smell. I imagine it as similar to a Jackson Pollock painting. There seems no order to the succession of smells one is confronted by; first an enticing aroma of frying garlic, then the awful stench of (the aptly named) stinky tofu, followed by an aroma of sewage emanating from God know’s where, and let us not forget the omnipresent smell of exhaust fumes. The procession goes on unabated as one strolls about the city. The smells brush past one's face like a brightly colored paintbrush, creating a chaotic scent-scape of massive proportions.

Garbage collection adds its daily dose to the odoriferous environment. The trash system here is rather complicated compared to what I am accustomed to. It is collected seven days a week. Different types of refuse are collected on different days. One day will be plastic bottles, another will be soft plastic (ie. plastic bags) and paper, and so on. “Wet Garbage” as they say here, is collected every day. One is to put his garbage into the proper bag, and then wait on the street side with his neighbours for the arrival of the garbage truck which comes at approximately the same time every evening (10:35 in my neighbourhood). This brings out young and old to stand together, smelly bags in hand, in a communal happening which, for a short time at least, can stink up much of the surrounding environs. When the truck arrives people either throw their own trash into the truck or hand it to one of the garbage men to dispose of. Leaving your refuse on the sidewalk for the garbage men to collect is sternly frowned upon. I rather like the routine. It is another aspect of Taipei which adds to the sense of community, and brings life to the streets.

I reckon it is my past as a street performer which makes street life so attractive to me. I feel that life, action, and community activities on the streets of a city help people to remember what they are: people. We are one of many, and all around us are others like us. Cities without vibrant streets allow us to cocoon, and withdraw from our communities. Active streets are healthy for not only the community at large, but for individual well-being. Even if the action is that of bringing out the garbage together.

Posted by Ryan at 12:43 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)